#1002

this is post number one thousand and two.

the year's ending, with the festive mood and year end celebs lingering around, even though i have never quite been someone to celebrate during this time of the year. this year, there's even lesser reason to. three days to christmas, i hadnt even prepped the christmas cards i usually send. ):

and its been a year. (:

i can't quite believe how fast the year had went by.

happiness and worries, tears and joy, love and sadness all in one.

its been quite a year, but i'm just thankful. thankful for all that i have.

thankful for the sunshine in my life.

sometimes, some things are always going to be too late. regrets, sorrys and things undone are examples.

anyway on a happier note,something i've been wanting to blog down but hadnt.
personality psych says: self report and non self report measures of happiness correlates with social desirability self report scores. this implies that a part of being happy is to have positive illusions about the self.
so i guess.. people shldnt say im delusion (regarding jay=husband). im just keeping in line with research findings on how to be happier. (:

gosh decemeber, stop raining on me.

it upsets me that people dont realise the power of their words. and especially so if its the people i do care about.
they dont know that much of the hurt/psychological disorders that eventually manifest in others are the result of their unkind, unthinking and critical comments.
sometimes i wished that i could tell them the adverse impact their words have (on me, and on others), 
but thinking that people will change, and expecting them to understand stuff that goes on in my mind, are but illusions and unrealistic expectations.
i need to stop expecting people, and the world, to be perfect. 

there must be some way i can change the world.
or perhaps i'd need to start changing myself first.

people and things keep disappearing from my life these days. i also need to disappear for a while.
maybe its easier this way.

(almost) midway into november

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(from)

poignantly summing up how i feel some days. jiayou!