dunno wat im tokign abt.

was thinking of how much we shld(not) live in the past.

how we should treat others.

how we get trapped in our own shadows so easily.

sighh.was reading someone's blog jus... and his life seem all so...well... in misery. i truly dont know what is bothering him, but its just uncomfy knowing someone i do noe, in distress yet i could only stand by and look. and look.and look. is that all i can do? sadly yes. i have been determined to start a somewhat new start, fresh, away from those memories. in the process, perhaps, i have put away the sadness. yet i nv felt as miserable as i think he's feeling now. no idea why. sighh. how easily we fall trap to ourselves, enclosed in our thoughts for too long... its hard to get out of it. i had a change in enviroment, so it was bad, but wasnt THAT so.

the new gp teacher came. shes ok, im in no position to comment. but i jus felt that we all, or mayb its jus me, fall into the hole...that sinful hole of preassumption. we, or at least i did... well, i didnt like her that much. and no, it was by no fault of her own. its jus i really wanna siva to stay, thats y i dun like the new girl .thats rreally bad ehh? yesyes. it is. certainly. but i cant help it, its jus this instanteous feeling of ASSUMING thats shes no good. sighh.i just wished i didnt. becos its mean...its mean to not let people have a chance to show them themselves and jus LABEL them with smth. smth bad. like how we dun give ppl chances, and we jus based everyth on first impressions? like how superificial iit is man. i see myself repeating that mistake everytime, every. i nv learn do i? i jus dun give ppl chances. but i wan to ...butits so hard. shldnt we treat her anew, not as a second inferiority perosn to siva but as someone DIFFERNT. both of them are different anw, they aint the same, it aint fair to compare. it aint.

and i hope i do noeit aint fair. jus that it nv goes into my dumbo head. and i end up making so many mistakes. so many. sighh. humans aint perfect i hope. else, i dunno wat am i.

am i just deluding myself, staying around here? should i jus move on? ehh?

do we delude ourselves? we do.
but...
do we do what we truly love? nahh.
do we say from our hearts? nahh.